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My husband first told me he wanted to marry me before I had even graduated high school. He was already in college and ready to go, but I had grown up with the mentality that we had to be at least through college and with steady, great paying jobs before even thinking about marriage. Naturally, this little bit of news freaked me out just a bit. Well fast forward a year, I had matured in my relationship with Christ and had fallen head over heels in love with this man. So when I was 18 my husband proposed and at the ripe old ages of 19 and 21, we tied the knot before our families, friends, and God.
I firmly believe that God calls us all into marriage at different times. God has a special and unique plan for everyone. Some couples are not mature enough, haven’t come to the Lord yet, or are not ready to get married until later in life. And some are ready at 19. I want to provide encouragement to you who were married young or perhaps are struggling to understand a couple you know who wants to get married young. There are many myths concerning getting married young and in fact some people go so far as to say that marriage before 25 should be illegal, so I want to share that God’s plans for young marriages can be a good and beautiful thing.
The Blessings of Young Marriage
I am a strong proponent of getting married young – if it’s God’s will for you. Not everyone is meant to get married at 19, but not everyone is meant to get married at 30 either. We each have a unique path to walk laid out for us from the Lord. And the blessings of getting married young can be wonderful.
One of the most beautiful things about getting married young is that we have grown up together. Our faith in the Lord has grown, we have learned how to handle money, and are now tackling what it means to be parents. The Lord has grown us up together and we wouldn’t have it any other way!
“Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth” ~ Proverbs 5:18
We have grown up together. We had the joys of saving up for our first TV together. The heartache of realizing we need to be better at saving money. The ups and downs of finances and figuring it out all together.
We have shared beautiful memories of developing interests together like bike riding, playing games, and taking a Segway tour on the beach. And all of this has created a beautiful environment of accountability and trust within our marriage.
The Struggles You Will Face
No marriage is perfect, and getting married young won’t let you escape from the fact that you married a sinner. While there are many blessings of getting married young, there are also some unique struggles.
Often when you get married young, you have never lived on your own before. Usually, this can bring blessings but other times it can present struggles.
You must learn how to handle finances together, you are often still developing in your career, and finances can become a strain. But as long as you are open and willing to talk about things, you can develop great habits early on when it comes to how you use money, spend your time, and prioritize things in your life.
Growing in the Lord
Perhaps the biggest blessing – and struggle – of getting married young is that you are still growing in your relationship with the Lord. If you have married for the right reasons, then you are well on the right track.
Maturity in Christ takes hard work, patience, and lots and lots of love. And as a young couple you have the unique opportunity of doing this together. Whether you are a brand new Christian or have been serving the Lord for 30 years, we all have things we can learn.
Make it a daily habit – from the first day of your marriage – to establish a firm foundation in the Lord. Learn to forgive quickly, show grace to your spouse, cultivate gratitude to your spouse, and make a commitment to form a Christ Centered marriage.
Yes, this takes daily work and a commitment to always making Christ the Center of your marriage. These are lessons that all marriages can learn and many couples start off their life without Christ as the center, so it’s never too late to form this habit.
Learn to put Christ FIRST in your marriage, and then your spouse. Raising a Christ Centered household can be tough but at the end of this life, it’s the only thing that matters.
We should consistently, constantly, and fervently work towards growing together in the Lord daily through talking together, reading God’s Word, worshiping together, praying together and finding godly mentors who we can follow their examples in marriage.