When you don’t feel accepted…and how to change that
A while back, a friend of mine shared how he will be walking his last daughter down the aisle to get married. The closeness, love, and pride this daddy feels for his girls is not something I can relate to.
I was happy for him and the heritage he and his wife have built in their marriage and family as they did their best to raise their kids in Christ.
But his life story sent off an emotional trigger in my soul and released a floodgate of memories marked by tears of unacceptance, loss, and feeling unloved.
This man was proud to be the father who gets to walk his little girls down the aisle while I couldn’t help but think about my own situation.
I didn’t know until the night before my wedding day if my father would be walking me down the aisle. And to hear a father say he is proud of his daughter were words I’ve never heard.
I fought to push back the tears that slid effortlessly down my face.
In the broken places of my heart, God reminds me that He is the Mender of souls stitching the pieces back together again. But I have to give Him those pieces to mend instead of hoarding them.
The pain I feel as a daughter is a reminder for me to fight for my marriage, family, and other relationships knowing that God fashioned me with the ability to cultivate Christ-centered connections- relationships reflecting love, forgiveness, and acceptance.
Every human being is fractured in some way because we live in a broken world; a world where others will disappoint you and hurt you.
Therefore accept one another, just as Christ also accepted you, to the glory of God. Romans 15:1 (CSB)
But just because we’re not accepted by others doesn’t mean we can’t accept others.
When You Don’t Feel Accepted…and how to change that
1.Whose approval are you seeking? Is it God’s or man?
Step back from your pain and figure out this answer.
For am I now trying to win the favor of people, or God? Or am I striving to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a slave of Christ. Galatians 1:10 (CSB)
There is no doubt that we can become slaves to our negative emotions based on how others treat us. Instead, choose to use your pain to be slaves of Christ by pointing others to Him as a result of your heartache.
2. Speak God’s truth to your soul.
The only remedy for my shaky and unstable soul was reading the scriptures.
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3. Regardless of how anyone else feels about you, remember that you are God’s kid.
You are the apple of His eye even when others have a negative viewpoint of you.
He kept (her) as the apple of his eye. Deut. 32:10
4. Believe God’s Word even when people and your emotions are in direct opposition to it.
Cling to the truth like it’s an emotional lifesaver. Because it is.
And then rest in God’s word knowing that the transformational process has begun. In no time, you’ll start to feel accepted even when others don’t accept you.
Live a poured out life for Christ,
Jolene Engle
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