Dear Jolene,I am so fully convinced that marriage is a gift from God, and I am excited to be a wife and a mother someday. What an amazing privilege those two callings are! So, with this all said, I am no where near marriage or motherhood. But my heart aches and longs for it. It’s what I desire, more than anything that this world has to offer. How should I deal with this, and how can I deal with knowing that this will definitely not come to pass for many years? I know discontentment is not from God, but I feel unhappy that I am unable to have either of these blessings (marriage or motherhood) for many many years. But I can’t have it yet. What should I do?~an eager wife and mom
Therefore, we wait.
When I was sick for those 10 years of my motherhood, I waited. I waited for God, the Great Physician to heal me. I was rather inpatient about this, by the way! Long-suffering was not a character trait that I possessed nor one I wanted to! But it is something that I’m familiar with today.
And when we had no money for food or a place to live, I waited. I waited for God to miraculously move in our lives. And guess what? He did just that and it was awesome to watch Him perform miracles on our behalf!
Waiting is just a part of our life, but through the waiting God is growing us into the women He desires us to be; whether we’re single, married, or married with children.
In the meantime, shift your perspective just slightly.
When I’m living through a huge tumultuous storm I try to put on what I call, ‘blinders.’ Blinders are what some racehorses wear over their eyes while they’re racing so they don’t get distracted. I wear blinders so I don’t look at my trials. Now if I stop to look at my trials one of two things will happen.
A. I’ll either freak out and lash out, or
B. I throw myself a pity party.
Being that neither of those options will help me in my trials, I try to prevent my flesh from doing them. I know the only way I can experience contentment and peace in the midst of waiting for the next storm to pass is if I keep my eyes on the Lord. Other than sitting at the Lord’s feet, the other thing I do is I become intentional about building God’s kingdom rather than my own. I don’t always succeed at this, by the way, because it’s a constant battle of my flesh vs. my spirit.
But I can tell you that the best path to contentment is drawing closer to God and embracing whatever plan He has for your life. I encourage you to become a vessel for Him no matter what stage of life you’re in and no matter what storm you’re experiencing.
Now godliness with contentment is great gain. 1 Timothy 6:6
For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:9