10 Ways a Wife Can Influence the Heart of Her Husband

I was in a room filled with women as we sat chatting about the Bible and that’s when it happened…

A woman from across the room responded to my comment when she said, “Your husband actually listens to you?”  Mine doesn’t listen to me!  I’ll tell him he should do certain things, but he doesn’t listen.”

I could tell based on the look in her eyes and the sadness in her voice she wished her relationship with her husband was different.  But because of the setting I was in, I couldn’t exactly go into a teaching on a wife’s influence- how she could use it or how she could lose it.

10 Ways a Wife Can Influence the Heart of Her Husband by Jolene Engle

Then I came home and shared the scenario with my man.  I asked him some questions so I could get a better understanding of the male gender.  I talked with him about influence, more specifically, what does a wife do (or not do) that stirs up the husband’s heart so she’s able to make a positive impact on his life.

“Why is it that I’m able to influence you, I asked.  What are those little things I do that cause you to take note in what I say?”

And so he shared with me the following:

10 Ways a Wife Can Influence the Heart of her Husband

  1. Be a wife he can trust.  Influence comes from trust and without trust, there is no influence.
  2. Be kind and gracious to him. He feels welcomed by this.
  3. Stand in his corner and fight with him against the world, rather than back him into a corner.  Every man wants a woman who is on his side when they’re in the midst of a trial.  Be the kind of wife who cheers him on so he can win the battle.
  4. Support him in his endeavors.  By believing in him and following him, this makes him feel like he can conqueror anything.
  5. Esteem him in public.  There is no higher compliment in his eyes.
  6. Be a safe place for him.  Accept him for who he is rather than judge him for his shortcomings.
  7. Let him know you’re praying for him.  This shows you care about his spiritual well-being.
  8. Be a passionate wife.  Pursue him intimately.
  9. Put him before the children.  Show him you respect him by teaching your children to respect him.
  10. Choose to be a joyful wife. Be content with life rather than gripe about life.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband.  Proverbs 12:4

An excellent wife is a wife who seeks to use her influence to bring glory to God rather than to glorify herself.  To learn more about this important marital principle of a wife’s influence, go here!

Live a poured out life for Christ,

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Comments

  1. says

    This was perfectly timed Jolene. My husband has been giving me a million excuses why he’s not looking for work and I feel he’s leaving all the responsibility on me to bring in an income. I feel so frustrated. Maybe if I try following these 10 things, he’ll be more inclined to want to contribute to our family.

  2. Candace says

    Jolene,
    This is great advice! I was wondering if I could use this article in our MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group monthly newsletter?

    • says

      Hi Candace, yes, you can use the article. If your newsletter is on-line please provide a link back to my site. If your newsletter is in print, make sure you add my website address to the article. Please don’t make any changes to the existing article, and my name as the author is given for copyright purposes.

  3. says

    my married life is in trouble now a days. after reading your articles i learned how can i safe my relation. please pray for me for a happy married life.

  4. Destiny says

    What if your husband dose not let you be a safe place for him or support him? What if your husband dosent let you be the best wife you can be.

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