When He Tells You He’s Not Attracted to You Because You’re Overweight
No wife wants to hear her husband is not attracted to her because she’s overweight. If my man made this statement to me, my heart would break. The blow of his words would leave me staggering. Thoughts would run through my mind of feeling ugly and undesired. To recover emotionally, I might be tempted to do one of the following:
a) Eat more food to bring me comfort,
b) hit the gym,
c) hit my husband. 😉
Although I would be tempted most by doing either A & C, these pursuits won’t bring me the healing needed. And while B is a good choice, this endeavor alone will not resolve the root issues of broken emotional trust and acceptance every wife needs in marriage, whether she’s overweight or not.
Listen to the podcast below to hear me and my husband weigh in on this delicate matter of how a wife can respond to her man.
Click below to hear my response.
“Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. Matt. 18:15
Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful. Col. 3:12-15
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Live a poured out life for Christ,
Thank you so much for addressing this issue. My husband has said this to me more than once and I’m only about 30 pounds from the weight I was when I met him 13 years ago. It was a blow to the heart, my self esteem, everything. I’ve since gone to the gym and working on other things to lose that weight with no support from him at all. It’s hard to forgive when those words hurt so much. I haven’t talked to him about it, I’m just so angry and mad that I sometimes just want to hold it against him and never have sex again. And when I do hit a good weight I want to hold back from having sex so he knows what it feels like. I know revenge is definitely not right, but sometimes I just want to.
Thanks for the podcast, I will talk to my husband about what this has done to me.
You are so welcome! I’m glad it was of help to you! I can only imagine the blow to your heart. What a blessing to hear you’re going to try to move forward and tell him how his words wounded you. Restoration will lead to a stronger marriage.
This also happens to women during and post menopause
It just so happens that I went through menopause at a very young age which I know is some of the problem. Getting old is so fun! haha!
I feel your pain. And I like your name. 🙂
Of course! Our hormones play a huge role in our metabolism. I entered peri-menopause at age 31. It’s been quite the emotional roller coaster and it’s wreaked havoc on my waistline.
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