Are You More Like His Mother or His Lover?
The need to control. That’s what we do as wives.
It’s our flesh seeping out and if we can’t get it under control, then our love story will start to erode.
Here’s what mothering our men looks like:
We tell him he doesn’t know how to parent, how to handle finances, how to lead the family, or even how to buy groceries! Don’t believe me on this? Take a look around at our society and you’ll see how we’re being conditioned by the world as they tell us that men are a bunch of idiots, completely incompetent to handle even the smallest tasks.
Can you just let things go and enjoy the man you married?
I mean, really enjoy him like you once did when you were dating and engaged? And let’s not forget the honeymoon period. The time when you couldn’t keep your hands off of each other and you had sex all the time. After all, that was one of the MAIN reasons why you married him. (Biblically speaking, unless you’re married, sex is only designed for husband and wife.)
So, my encouragement to you would be to learn to act more like his lover rather than his mother. Come on now, does it really matter that he doesn’t fold the laundry the way you do? Or he doesn’t make the eggs the way you do?
The more you point out to him how he’s not doing things right and how you have to show him the way to do everything, then you need to face reality…. You’re treating your husband as if he’s a child and he doesn’t know how to get through life without you parenting him. You’ve become more like his mother, rather than his lover when you continually take this approach with your man.
A few things are going to happen in your marriage if you continue down this path….
He’s going to resist you and not put up with your nonsense. That’s code for: expect arguments to ensue in your marriage.
He’s going to keep his mouth shut and pull away from you emotionally AND he’ll probably stop helping you in your endeavors. Why would he? You’re always telling him he’s doing it wrong.
Your relationship becomes platonic. If you wanted a platonic relationship to begin with it, wouldn’t it have been easier to get a dog than to get married?
Release your control and rest in Christ, my sweet friend.
“Be still, and know that I am God.” – Psalm 46:10
So friend, do you struggle in this area?
Live a poured out life for Christ,
Jolene
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