I’m so excited to have my sweet friend, Pearl from Pearl’s Oysterbed, on The Alabaster Jar! Today she’s going to be sharing on s*xual intimacy (because that’s her thing to write about!) but before we get into the post, I wanted to say a few things.First, if you’re a single woman, then stop right here. This post is for married women so please don’t read any further since this topic does not apply to your life at this time. Let’s not stir up love until it’s appropriate time, shall we?
Second, allow me to introduce you to Pearl!
The grittiness of life has helped shape Pearl. Her luster comes from layers of experience and HOPE from the beloved Word of God. Pearl has parented children with learning issues, has navigated the genepool of mental illness, and has dealt with marital conflict and sexual fulfillment issues. Pearl focuses on sexual intimacy and restoring waning female libido. She wishes to share HOPE with her beautiful readers to help them understand their men, marriage and sex. Swim on over to Pearl’s OysterBed where the water is fine!
So let’s give Pearl a big welcome to The Alabaster Jar because she wrote this post just for you!
OK, don’t hate me. But, I have to say a dirty 8 letter word…EXERCISE.
Exercise is a blessing I reluctantly embraced. But, I knew I had to change my lifestyle. With three teenage sons under one roof (one with clinical depression) and a marriage that needed some repair, I coped through food/alcohol and mindless television. It was destroying my health. The doctor was not happy with my weight, blood test numbers and blood pressure. Libido was nowhere to be seen. My once vigorous body was huffing, puffing and wobbly when walking up only one flight of stairs! I felt ungainly, wimpy, and not sexually attractive for my husband. Something had to be done, but what?
PRAYER and BIBLE STUDY revealed a better avenue of managing stress.
“And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will restore you himself and make you strong, firm and steadfast,” 1 Peter 5:10.
This method had transformed relatives and friends. Articles touted that it helped increase libido.
It was exercise.
“Deeply disturbed” is how I used to label those who crave exercise. (Now, I see them as blessed of God!) As much as I didn’t want to work at it, I didn’t want to remain weak and feeble. Sexual stirrings needed to be restored. My husband was making great strides in connecting with me emotionally and I wanted to connect with him sexually as part of our repair process.
First, I put on boxing gloves. But kick-boxing was too high impact for my joints. Yoga and the treadmill didn’t cut it. Jazzercise was the jackpot. The wide variety of dance routines and music kept me interested.
Less Brain Fog, Ability to Preserve Good Mental Acuity
Chinese research has proven that exercise in middle aged mice can increase neural (brain) stem cell production. Exercise helps keep your brain from deteriorating and even helps with growth of new neural cells.
The success of an accomplished goal and of prayer answered did wonders.
Pain Management– Aches and pains have diminished due to the endorphin release. Dealing with less pain helps me cope with life better. Strength – I can get the pickle-jar lid off by myself! Weight bearing exercise is shown to help stave off osteo-perosis. Better Food choices – Why sabotage improved health with unhealthy intake? Again through prayer and beneficial brain chemicals, exercise helped me have better self-control. Stamina – I can now play/work for longer periods of time without feeling drained, which leads to the next item….
Sexual Empowerment– Exercise hit a home run in my libido rescue mission! (See former Pearl post, Where Did My Sexy Go?)
Libido increased – serotonin (mentioned above) is released which triggers the sexy feeling of desire. Feeling less anxiety also helps to increase sexual desire. Turned-on hubby – Mr. Muscle, admired my effort and the results he saw. This made me feel even spicier.
According to Michael Gurian, in “What Could He Be Thinking?” a man may actually feel that his wife is ‘doing her part’ by keeping physically active and sexually attractive. (And Pearl’s opinion…this can be flipped, that a man is doing his part by staying physically healthy and living longer, as well.) More strength allows exploration of different sexual positions. Better self-image allows me to be comfortable feeling sexually desirable.
“Did you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own…You were bought with a price, therefore honor God with your bodies,” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20.
ULTIMATELY, I gained the ability to better serve the Lord. Exercise helped improve my marriage through more satisfying sexual desire and ability. Mr. Muscle and I can mentor a happy godly marriage to our children and the world.
Exercise helped improve physical and mental health, so that I could look to the needs of others.
Exercise is cheaper than prescription drugs for pain and depression.
Exercise isn’t a cure-all, but it’s pretty darn close.
Do you need to make some lifestyle changes, like me?
You CAN do this, I KNOW you can because the Lord will help you!!
PRAY about becoming healthy. Health is a healing balm and it is pleasing to God when you take care of His Temple. How many miracles of healing did Jesus bestow? Let the Holy Spirit partner with you in this journey. Exercise God’s Spirit. Tap into the self-control and diligence the Spirit can provide.
JUST MOVE, find your favorite (jazzercise, zumba, swimming, walking, biking, vigorous sex). Research states the type of exercise doesn’t matter to reap benefits. Consistency is important. START SLOW and work your way into it! A 10 minute walk each night for a week, 20 minutes the next week, etc.
(Disclaimer: Before beginning any exercise program, consult with your physician.)
Final Prayer for you, beautiful ladyfish:
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit,” Romans 15:13.
Okay friend, so I happen to agree with Ms. Pearl because I, too, have lived through depression and hormone issues and I can honestly tell you that exercise makes a huge difference in my mind and body as well!
Now head on over to Pearl’s OysterBed and welcome her as she is new to the on-line blogging ministry. Like her page or subscribe to her emails.
And thank you sweet Pearl for sharing your heart and helping other wives with these very important issues.
Now it’s time to link up your posts below!
I’m looking for posts on any and all things related to being a wife, i.e. homemaking ideas, ways you minister to your husband, dating ideas, and/or hearing what the Lord is telling you about your most important earthly relationship!
Link back to this community, either by using the button below or a text link. Link to your actual “Marital Oneness Mondays” post, not just your general blog address–that way if readers come by later in the week, they can click your relevant post.
Hi Jolene and Pearl – such a great post. Just the kick in the butt I need. Been telling myself for ages to get ‘moving’ and reaping all those awesome blessings for myself and for my marriage.
God bless you guys for your openness and honesty
ps: going over to Pearl’s now…
So blessed to hear this encouraged you Tracy!
Excellent advice. Thanks for the great post & for hosting the linkup.
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