Here’s one reader’s story….
Dear Jolene,I am writing to ask for your help or a direction you could lead me in. My husband is very sick undergoing treatment for his liver similar to chemotherapy. We have three wonderful children Sophia, age 4 she is a little mommy, Alexis age 3 who is a free spirit and her smile lights up the room and a son Anthony who is 3 months and he is such a happy baby. We live off of $500 a month so needless to say we have no money for Christmas. Any ideas you have or any help you could give would be greatly appreciated.~Renee
First, you and your family are in my prayers! Second, I’m glad you reached out. Now if I were in your shoes, I’d do a couple of things…
For beginners, tweak your perspective just slightly. Recognize that God has given you the ability to give your children a teaching moment, one that will make an impact on their souls. Since your children are so young, you have the perfect opportunity to teach them to minister to others, especially their father since he is so sick right now.
If you teach your children while they’re still little to bless others, they won’t have such a selfish and greedy heart during Christmas and they’ll truly want to bless others. I know it’s hard, but try to realize that this character building moment is truly a blessing in the midst of your heartache.
When God is in the process of transforming our lives, it generally hurts our flesh, which causes us the inability to see the good it’s creating in our spirit!
I’d probably sit with your kids and have them make a ‘Daddy Book’ of some type that includes photos of him with the children or cards they have given him over the years. Perhaps getting old photos from when he was growing up, along with a few wedding photos could be added to the book as well. Of course this project could be pricey, but it doesn’t have to be. Plain paper, a glue stick and maybe some old ribbon lying around could make the book look precious. You can make it as simple as possible knowing that it is the thought behind it that counts. And you’re children will delight in the giving.
Your kiddos could also make his favorite meal (that you can afford) and they can even create a restaurant-type of atmosphere in the home. All of you could dress up in nice clothes, light some candles, and serve your simple meal on china plates if you have them. I’m sure your kids would love this activity! And again, you’re teaching them to focus on others, rather than themselves.
Have them give, serve, and bless others first, then flip the tables so you can give and bless them. When they do receive gifts from others, most likely they’ll have more of an attitude of gratitude because they now have first-hand experience of serving someone else.
And I have been a constant example of how you can help those in need by working hard. You should remember the words of the Lord Jesus: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.'” Acts 20:35
10 Low-Cost to No-Cost Christmas Ideas
Many of the activities listed below you can put in coupon form (with pictures since your kids are so young). Wrap the coupon up in a big box or a little box or even a box within a box. Kids just love to open presents! If you don’t have Christmas wrapping paper, then use a brown bag and decorate it ahead of time with the kiddos. Or you can use old wrapping paper and turn it over to use the plain white side. Have them draw Baby Jesus, crosses, wise men, angels, manger scenes, etc.
- A camp-out in the living room. You can use a tent if you have one, or blankets to build a fort because every child loves that!
- Movie night with popcorn. (If you have no TV and can’t afford a video, you can use your computer. This is something we do. Check out hulu.com.)
- Hot chocolate and story time.
- If it’s raining in your area you can go puddle-stomping. When my boys were little they always wanted to stomp in puddles especially when we were at church! I decided to teach them to stomp in puddles when they were dressed for it and when I was as well! So when the rainy season came along I’d dress them up, grab our umbrellas and then go puddle-stomping! They loved every minute of it. Then we came home and headed for a nice hot bath. Afterwords I dress them in something cozy and warm and then I gave them a delicious cup of cocoa.
- If you receive gifts or gift cards from others during this difficult time of your life, wrap them up and place them under the tree (if you have one) and wait until Christmas morning for your kids to open it. Let them know that such and such gift was given to them by so-and-so. Make sure you let them know that Jesus used these people to minister to your children. They probably won’t understand this concept but just sharing that Truth will minister to you and your husband, which is something you both need at this time!
- If you have any sweets in your house (we didn’t always have this) then let them eat dessert before dinner! Yes, be an irresponsible Mommy just for a day! Another spin off of this would be to go out to a fast-food restaurant and order dessert off their dollar menu and eat it there. Then come home and fix them dinner. Make a big deal out of this outing and I guarantee you they’ll look forward to it all day!
- On Christmas Eve morning, go get donuts in your pj’s. The men in my family LOVE donuts! So I created a tradition one year where I decided to get donuts on Christmas Eve morning in our pj’s. We started doing this when my boys were about 3-5 yrs. old and they still want to do it to this day.
- Have a family game night. My youngest son loves board games, but my husband loathes them. It’s a real treat to my son if we play a game as a family because he knows that his father is doing so out of love for him.
- Give them some of their favorite foods or treats. Last year I gave my husband his favorite lemon pudding and sweetened tea. My boys got a box of donuts, gum, and if I remember correctly, some Nutella! I’m sure I spent less than $15 because that was still a stretch for us.
- Pray and ask the Lord to bring gifts for your children. Also, humble yourself (which is extremely difficult to do!) and ask the Body of Christ for help. Many times people are willing to help, but they don’t realize there’s a need. Something you can do is ask for old hand-me-down clothes or toys that their children are no longer using and you can wrap those items up as gifts. Children that live in third-world countries would love to receive the Americans’ hand-me-downs. It’s all in one’s perspective!
Two Christmas’ ago, my children didn’t receive anything from us because we had no money even for the smallest gifts. But God knew our situation because He was, and is, our CFO; Chief Financial Officer! I just waited for Him to show Himself to our children.
My kids were old enough to know what was taking place in their lives. They were 9 and 11 at the time. At one point, my eldest had no other choice but to walk around with holes in the bottom of his shoes while it was raining outside. He’d come in from the rain with socks that were sopping wet. My heart would break and I was concerned for his faith in Christ. But God had a plan in all of that. Christ was transforming my son’s heart, as well as mine, my husband’s and my youngest son’s.
My boys heard their whole lives how Jesus is the One who takes care of us, provides for us, and gives us good things. But during that time of our lives, Jesus needed to manifest in their lives. This was where the rubber was meeting the road, so to speak, in their lives. Yes, this was extremely difficult for my flesh to experience because inside I was a doubting, fearful and hurting Mommy. However, my spirit kept running back to the Word, and like a rabid dog, I clung to His promises! My only other choice was to become bitter towards the Cross or walk away from Christ while I was living through these difficult circumstances. I wasn’t willing to settle for either option seeing how I already took that path once before in my life and it didn’t work. But of course I had my own little pity-parties from time to time! 🙂
From that time many of His disciples went back and walked with Him no more. “Then Jesus said to the twelve, “Do you also want to go away?” But Simon Peter answered Him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.” Also we have come to believe and know that You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.” John 6:66-69
My children and your children belong to God before they belong to us, and because of this, the Lord will minister to your children in spite of your circumstances. He’ll just do it in a different way than how you imagined and He’ll do a much better job than what we could ever do!
That Christmas when we had nothing to give to our children, God showed Himself in a big way! I like to call that post The 5 Days of Christmas (although, that’s not it’s title). If you have the time you should read all the miracles that Christ performed because it was truly amazing and it’ll strengthen your faith!
As a result of all those miracles, my children’s faith in Christ grew. The faith that we had been teaching them over all those years was now starting to become their own.
Now friend, today I’m asking for your help; your creativity, your ideas, as well as your prayers for this dear sister. Please chime in at the comment section with more low-cost/no-cost ideas that would minister to any child.
Also, I have a challenge for you: If you’re not in need then can you please give to those who are? Is there someone in your family, circle of friends, church, or neighborhood that might need to see the hands of Jesus in their life right now? If so, bless them with something tangible, even if all you can give is your gently used toys and clothes! If you’re on Facebook, one thing you can do is post a status asking if there is a family/child in need and I’m sure you’ll find someone. Also, will you share this post there, too? It may minister to others and it may stir up the Body of Christ to pour out their lives for the King of Kings.
Live a poured out life for Christ,
5 Days to a Better Marriage
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