That place that caused me so much pain and suffering.
That place that made me feel like I had no life.
That place where I was trapped in my own body.
That place were I looked fine on the outside, but on the inside I was a wreck.
That place where I just had to push through life.
That place that forced me to abandon my dreams.
That place where I was never physically enough for my family.
That place where I felt like a failure as a wife and mother.
That place where I felt useless for His service.
That place that still brings me to tears even as I type this now.
No, I don’t want to go back to that place; that place called the land of chronic ill-health.
- Write my story.
- Equip and encourage women in their marriages.
- Strengthen women in their faith (trials, whatever they are, will ALWAYS be a part of the believer’s life.) When a woman’s faith is strong, she’ll be able to weather any storm that comes her way.
“As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.”
Lord, Why on Earth Would You Allow This? (The Refiner’s Fire, Part 2)
“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9
Lord, why on earth would you allow this?
|The pain was unbearable. When would it end?|
“Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord.” James 5:14
During year 5 of my health journey, I prayed for contentment.
“Now godliness with contentment is great gain.” 1 Timothy 6:6
It is funny how our journey with the Lord is called our ‘Christian walk’. To me, it felt like a ‘crawl’. I never felt like I was in an upright position pursuing Jesus. I was so broken and feeble that I daily had to crawl to Him.
“He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. For the more we suffer for Christ, the more God will shower us with his comfort through Christ. Even when we are weighed down with troubles, it is for your comfort and salvation! For when we ourselves are comforted, we will certainly comfort you. Then you can patiently endure the same things we suffer.” 2 Corinthians 1:4-6
God’s hand of faithfulness has always been upon us even when I did not understand why God was taking us through this major storm. When the IRS audited us, they found that they owed us several thousand dollars and the lawsuit that went on for 5 years, the plaintiffs dropped the case against my husband because there was no case. See how God works!
The Lord is always with us but sometimes through all of the pain we can’t see Him, feel Him, or hear Him.
He is with you as well. He is refining you for a purpose that is just for Him so He can be revealed through you! Don’t get discouraged and don’t lose hope. He is always right there by your side when you are hurting and when you are questioning.
He was right by Job’s side when he questioned the Lord as well. And what was the Lord’s response to Job?
“Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell Me, if you have understanding. Job 38:4
Sometimes we are not going to understand everything that God takes us through. We just need to be obedient and faithful to Him despite our hardships because God does not owe us anything.
And he (Job) said: “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, And naked shall I return there. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; Blessed be the name of the LORD.” Job 1:21 (my emphasis)
Live a poured out life for the Master,