When I married my man I wanted to be known as an honorable wife. Being a woman of my word was, and still is, important to me because I am ultimately representing Christ, and because of this, I actively pursue being trustworthy.
In the same way, their wives are to be women worthy of respect, not malicious talkers but temperate and trustworthy in everything. 1 Timothy 3:11
The one key element your man greatly needs from you is your trust.
If this virtue is lacking in your marriage, issues will ensue and your one flesh union will be hindered.
Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. Proverbs 31:11 (NLT)
In any relationship, if trust is lacking, the relationship will be fragile. After all, what woman wants to spend time with another woman who doesn’t follow through on her word or worse yet, has betrayed her confidence? I’m not raising my hand to sit and have coffee with a woman like this anytime soon!
Webster’s definition of trust:
a : assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something
b : one in which confidence is placed
So I ask myself the following:
- Does my character exude any of the above?
- Am I a woman of my word?
- Do I follow through on what I say I’m going to do and when I’m going to do it?
- Or am I just paying lip service to my husband?
- Do I over-exaggerate the circumstances?
- Make excuses of why I didn’t take care of something?
- And do I really have a headache?
If I’ve cried wolf one too many times in my marriage then I can’t be surprised if my man no longer trusts me.
Another thing I ask myself to keep my heart in check is:
Are my actions more reliable and honorable toward my closest girlfriends and family members than they are with my husband?
If so, then I need to readjust my focus and priorities and get a better handle on my commitments and my character.
The Benefits of a Being a Trustworthy Wife
- Your man will start to feel like he matters to you.
- He’ll feel like you respect him.
- He’ll feel like you’ve got his back. This makes him feel supported by you.
- His heart will soften toward you because of your integrity and loyalty toward him.
- He’ll open up to you more. Over time, his walls will likely come down. When I feel emotionally safe with my man, I share more of my heart with him.
- And if he has the tendency to treat you like a child, once he starts to trust in you, his attitude towards you should change.
4 Simple Ways to Build (or Rebuild) Trust in Your Marriage
- Keep your word.
- Tell the truth.
- Be transparent.
- Give without expecting anything in return.
If you’ve been less than honest in your marriage, no worries here my friend. Just humbly apologize to your husband and let him know you’d like to start over. Share with him that you’d like to be a wife that he can safely trust in.
Be a trustworthy wife whether or not your husband is trustworthy.
“If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities. Luke 16:10
Not only will your husband’s life be greatly enriched by your trustworthy character, but your marriage will grow stronger and you’ll reap those benefits as well!
And if you’re a mama? Well, no mama I know wants to raise a liar. More is caught than taught. Our kiddos learn from us. Show them by your actions by simply letting your ‘yes’ be ‘yes’ and your ‘no’ be ‘no’. And if you can’t deliver on what you’ve said, then seek to be honest without making excuses.
Live a poured out life for Christ,