A Letter to My 16 Year Old Self

Dear Self, (and all the other girls and women who need to hear this message,)

You’ve barely lived and you already have so many scars from this harsh world. The loneliness, rejection and insecurities you’re facing can still bring this 42 year old woman to tears. I’m so sad for you that someone hasn’t extend their hand to help and guide you to the One who made you and saw that you were good and that you were fearfully and wonderfully made. No, this is not your reality at age 16…

However, I’m here to tell you there is One who is pursuing you, One who will never leave your side, and One who will call you His own. So don’t despair sweet child, He’s coming for you. And when He finds you, He’ll heal your scars through His own.

But just know that He’ll come for you a little bit later in life, after you’ve ran your world into the gutter and you’ve hit rock bottom. Being that you’re a strong, pig-headed kinda gal that’s what it’s going to take for you to admit your need for a Savior.

And although you’re going to make some ~~less than stellar choices~~ really, really stupid decisions in your future, I’m here to tell you that with Christ, all things are made new. Regardless of what you’re about to do, how you’re going to live, and how you were raised, Christ will radically transform your life and forgive you for EVERYTHING. And how do I know this? Because I’m living proof of His Power.

Do you remember the two words that were NEVER in your vocabulary?

Yep, you guessed it, Submit and Respect.

Well, I freely do those things today. Betcha never saw that one coming!

I know, I know, try not to look so shocked and close your mouth because you’re catching flies.

I realize you were the kid, who at age 7, said that when you get married your husband was going to take your last name.

Well, surprise, surprise. You were wrong. Again.

Oh, and you’re going to marry your Freshman volleyball coach. Yeah, the one you call ‘Engle’ because of the disdain you have for him.

You look like a hardened criminal in this picture. In fact, I think it could be used as a mug shot.

Don’t worry it’s not like he had the hots for you back then because that was clearly not the case! The Lord is going to choose your husband, oh, yes He is! No offense, but as you get older, you do a lousy job of picking men. So I figured I’d let the Wisest Person I know choose my man.

Again, close your mouth because you’re letting the flies in!

I’m much wiser than you think you are and here’s why:

You see, you’re taking your guidance from the world, but I, on the other hand, I’m seeking counsel and wisdom from the Author and Giver of Life.

You know, I can’t wait for you to meet the Lord because He’s way smart!

In fact, He’s got you all figured out.

Yes, that little cynical type of laugh that I just laughed means you’re going to go through some enormous amounts a pain as He refines you. And while I realize I’m the one who is going to experience that pain as well, here’s a new flash, I already lived through years of it. And I’m still alive and okay to write about it. In fact, I’m better than okay because the Lord taught me that life is not about me. No, it’s about Him.

But when you become a daughter of the Most High God, let me forewarn you about a few pit holes and snares from the Enemy:

You still won’t be enough, ever.

You still won’t be accepted by others.

You still won’t fit in.

You’ll still feel socially awkward.

You’ll still ruffle feathers; always, so get used to the rejection. So come to terms with your God-given personality sooner, rather than later and make life easier on me, will ya?

Now here’s something you need to know, the Christian journey is an interesting one. A lot of masks are worn and there’s a continual striving for perfection.

Let me just tell you right now that seeking perfection is overrated. It’ll rob you of your joy and peace and the emphasis will be placed on you instead of Christ. So don’t go there, girlfriend!

Oh, and the whole mask-wearing thing… I just don’t get why others wear it to be honest with you. I personally believe I’d suffocate in that thing! Maybe others will read this and want to start burning their masks too?

Now seeing how I’m an old lady to you, take my advice from one recovering control-freak to one who needs to learn the hard way….

Just rest in Christ. Strive to seek Him and Him alone.

So to you, and all others reading this, remember these things:

You are Redeemed. Loved. Accepted. Cherished. Created by the Maker of the Universe. You are worth every ounce of His blood. And you don’t need to be perfect. But you, 16 yr. old self, you don’t need to worry too much in that department because even though you get saved, you still screw up a lot! And when you do and life is oh, so ridiculously hard…..

Cling to Christ. Always.

Oh, and God is going to ask you to do some very hard things, so don’t be surprised if He asks you to go to Ninevah!

I forgot, you have no idea what Ninevah is.

Well, it’s a place that God sent a man named Jonah to, but Jonah didn’t want to obey His maker. He thought he was smarter than the Creator, (just a little side note here, Jonah wasn’t a very bright man so try not to follow in his ways, please!) Emulate the Apostle Paul instead. Or better yet, set your eyes to walk in the ways of Jesus Christ.

Anyways, because I know you so well, I know you’re not going to want to do what the Lord asks of you, but please don’t embarrass me and throw a tantrum!

You can either obey God or get swallowed by a whale (that’s what happened to Jonah.) So I implore you to choose Ninevah, sweet one, choose Ninevah! Because if there is one thing I have learned in all my years, it is this:

God is smarter than you are!

And when you get knocked down over and over in this life, don’t lose hope. It’s just part of your story.

You’ll still mess up as a Christian but it’s okay because God doesn’t expect us to be perfect because that’s impossible. No, you’re not enough and you’re not perfect because you’re not designed to be. It is when you’re weak that His power is on display for all to see. And if you happen to be a vessel that’s broken….then that’s even better because it’s through your shattered cracks that His light shines forth from you the most.