10 Ways to Know if You’re Emasculating Your Husband

In our culture today, men are being emasculated left and right by the women in their lives. Young men are even acting more and more effeminate- showing characteristics typical of a woman.

I often wonder where are all the Godly, masculine men?  Well, women (especially wives) have such a tremendous influence over how the men in our lives will act based on how we act as women.

God created males and females with distinctly different roles.  This doesn’t mean a woman is better than a man or a man is better than a woman.  It simply means we’re different.

So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Genesis 1:27

If I want to have a passionate marriage, then I need to act like a feminine woman and not expect my man to act like me. He should act like a man.  But often times, if I’m not intentional with my words, actions, or attitudes, I can easily emasculate him.

Here is a simply guide to help you discern whether you are emasculating your man or not.

1.You control him.

Under the guise of being his ‘helper’ you tell him everything he needs to do.  How to lead the family, parent the kids, handle the finances, take care of things around the home, what he should eat, how he should do his job, and on and on.

Challenge: Start in one area of your life and let go of your control.  Instead, learn to control your emotions so they don’t cause more friction in your marriage.

Go deeper:  Ask yourself and the Holy Spirit to reveal to you why you are controlling your man.

2.You mother him while you give honor and respect to your children.

Ouch.  This is so easy for me to do if I’m not intentional about being my husband’s wife instead of his mommy.  My kids are not the center of my universe.  Jesus is.  And after Jesus, then comes my husband.  My children need me to parent them and they need to see me give my husband honor and respect.

Challenge: Give your husband honor and respect whether you’re feeling it or not.

3.You tell him how to manage the money.  

Financial security is a huge deal to a woman!  I’ve walked through the land of poverty and it ain’t no fun.  But, my relationship with my man is more important to me than what’s in our bank account.

Challenge: Recognize the root issue to your heart is due to your fears.  Fear is not of the Lord so don’t let fear weaken and sever your relationship.  After all, your marriage is more important than money.

4.You take the lead in the marriage. 

This right here is the kiss of death to your love story.  And it’s exhausting! I never feel like my husband’s girlfriend when I’m in charge.  So, I do my part in a biblical marriage, which is to support and respect my husband.

I happen to laugh more when the weight is on my husband’s shoulders and not on mine.

Challenge:  Be intentional to step back and let him lead.

You can get the rest of this article in our private community of Christian Wife University.

Live a poured out life for Christ,

Jolene Engle