4 Ways to Touch the Soul of Your Husband

The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.

Proverbs 31:11,12

If you want to draw emotionally closer to your husband then demonstrate the following to him:

1. A kind heart.

Something very common happens after a wife gets married—we get consumed with the responsibilities of life. We’re pulled in many different directions and the natural by-product is that our husbands get our leftovers. And sometimes our leftovers are laced with an impatient and harsh tone, a snide comment, or a critical glare.

I don’t know about you but when I’m stressed out and overwhelmed with life, it’s difficult for me to be kind—especially toward my husband. So I have to work extra hard to manage my schedule (and my emotions) so my husband doesn’t end up with a rude wife.

Rude wife=rude husband. This is not the dynamic I’m going for in my marriage.

And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32

2. A respectful attitude.

A husband always stands taller when his wife is proud of him and shows him respect.  Disapproving of his leadership abilities, how he handles money, the way he interacts (or doesn’t interact) with others communicates to your man that you don’t respect him. Focus on your husband’s strengths instead of his weaknesses. (I’m sure you’d like him to do the same to you.)

3. A supportive spirit.

We can all use someone who cheers us on and believes in us. Be that person to your husband.

Does your husband know you’ll be there for him? Or does he feel all alone?

Does he know you’re in his corner when he’s facing a battle? Or does he feel like he’s battling against you, too?

Does he have dreams that you can support and encourage him in? (I’m not talking sinful and destructive dreams here.)

4. A desire to meet his needs.

When I was dating Eric, I’d move mountains to meet his needs. After over two decades of marriage, it’s easy for me to get complacent in this pursuit. But, I don’t want a complacent marriage, I want a thriving one. Therefore, being intentional in meeting his needs is key.

• Emotional-ask him how’s he doing. Just a simple question like this can show him that you care. When he responds, make sure you give him eye contact and pay attention to what he is saying.
• Mental-ask him if there’s anything you can do to lessen his load.
• Spiritual– ask him how you can pray for him.
• Physical– meet his sexual desire. By God’s design, only a wife can meet this need. Put sex on the calendar. (Planned sex is better than no sex.) If this is too hard for you to verbalize, send him a text or leave him a note letting him know you’re looking forward to being with him. (If you’ve been the gatekeeper of sex, then you need to make the first move and initiate it. If he’s moved out of the bed, ask him to come back.) I know from firsthand experience that sex can be complicated. You can read more about that here and here.

If you make a habit of doing all of the above you’ll soon find your husband safely trusting in you.

Live a poured out life for Christ,

Jolene Engle